WormCo would like to extend our deepest condolences to one of our most famous ex-employees, Kid Rock. It seems that Kid is being divorced by his wife, Pamela Anderson.
Most pop-culturalists will tell you that Kid Rock got his name from his rock-n-roll lifestyle, but those of us close to Kid know that his name goes much deeper than that. Kid Rock was in fact just a kid that turned over rocks for us here at WormCo - and was the youngest employee ever promoted to Head Digger at our Detroit branch.
Unfortunately we had to let Kid go in 1987 after he was caught peddling illegal Colombian "white pony" Worms outside of a Detroit nightclub. If there is one thing we don't tolerate at WormCo, it is the sale or purchase of any wormcotics by our employees. Kid was able to bounce back, however - and his mix of rock and rap was able to nearly replace his income that he made working for WormCo.
You won't hear this on other sites regarding Kid, but he called one of our Worm Relations staff last night and spilled the worms on what actually is causing the divorce. Kid Rock had a pet worm that he kept out in the shed behind the couple's Malibu home. When Anderson discovered that Kid had named the 24" Giant Palouse Earthworm Tommy Lee, she ran out of the house screaming something to the effect of "Tommy Lee, I love you lover!!!" This clearly had something to do with Anderson's first marriage to drummer Tommy Lee of Motley Crue - but we here at WormCo aren't exactly sure what to make of the incident.
One thing is sure - if you decide to compare your worm to your wife's ex-husband, you'd better make darn sure that your worm measures up.
Good luck, Kid Rock - here's to hoping life's mother-worm-load is under the next rock you turn.
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